


Pack Bonding

by spiffyjiffy



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Venom (Movie 2018)
Genre: Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Fluffy Ending, Funny, Humor, Minor Eddie Brock/Venom Symbiote, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-28
Updated: 2018-10-28
Packaged: 2019-08-08 18:49:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,770
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16434869
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spiffyjiffy/pseuds/spiffyjiffy
Summary: This was a bad idea. Of all the ideas that Eddie had ever had in his shitty excuse for a life this was his worst idea ever. Not only was he about to become wanted for treason against the country, but he was most definitely about to commit a heinous act in front of hundreds of people and their very handy smartphones.or when Eddie and Venom are at an animal rehabilitation center and deep conversations are had.





	Pack Bonding

**Author's Note:**

> This was so enjoyable to write. It came at me in a whirlwind when I was trying to think of an animal transformation plot for a different fanfic. Alas, there is no actual animal transformation in this fic but it does have a hefty amount of animal talk in it. I hope you enjoy reading!

This was a bad idea. Of all the ideas that Eddie had ever had in his shitty excuse for a life _this_ was his worst idea ever. Not only was he about to become wanted for treason against the country, but he was most definitely about to commit a heinous act in front of hundreds of people and their very handy smartphones. He had taken what he thought was an easy money job, one that conveniently also spread a good message, but no. Nothing in his life could ever be easy cause Eddie was a loser, and apparently he no longer had a brain because he should have seen this problem coming from a mile away. He has been living with an alien parasite-

**“NOT A PARASITE! APOLIGIZE!”**

 -for the past 3 months and he was still having lapses in judgement. It was hard sometimes to remember that Venom was there and that he should account for his presence in something as mundane as choosing a story to report on. Believe-

**“IM RIGHT HERE APOLOGIZE!”**

 -it or not Venom wasn’t always commenting on Eddie’s thoughts, he was awake most of the day but Venom was more like a cat. He liked to take frequent naps, especially when Eddie was working, it just wasn’t in Venoms interest to be awake when Eddie was searching for his next big story or when he was typing up an article. He-

**“I AM NO PARASITE EDDIE! YOU ARE BEING RUDE!”**

 was always awake when Eddie was conducting an interview or doing a broadcast, but for the desk work he clocked out as soon as their butt hit the couch. What a parasite.

**“I’m going to eat your liver Eddie…”**

“Well maybe if you stopped putting me in awkward situations I would feel less of a need to insult your existence. Also, while you’re at it stop looking at the national symbol of patriotism like it’s our next meal, it’s making me queasy.”

**“It’s a bird Eddie. A juicy big bird. At least it is not a human, you hate when I eat humans.”**

“In all honesty I’d rather eat a human than touch a feather on that bald eagle over there, I would be cast out of the country right after Captain America, Mr. Patriotism himself, punched us in the face and then we would die cause I would have no job, a messed up face, and no money to pay for any chocolate.” Venom grumbled at the last part but finally seemed to accept the fact that there would be no devouring of the national icon. Eddie was at the zoo on strictly business, he was writing up an article about a newly opened animal rehabilitation center that housed disabled animals that, do to human missteps, can no longer survive by themselves in the wild. The eagle in front of them had gotten caught in wire fencing and had to have a part of its wing amputated; all in all the rehabilitation center was a positive addition to the scandalous vibe that LA normally gave off. He had gotten most of what he needed from multiple interviews with employees and had gotten a tour of the behind the scenes operations, but he found himself wandering the parts of the center open to the public and now he had no desire to leave.

**“Eddie…. I sense more animals around the corner. I want to see them… Can we?”**

“V… I don’t plan on indulging your appetite today. This is a rehabilitation center for injured wildlife, we aren’t about eat defenseless animals.”

**“Not hungry Eddie. Just curious…. Please?”**

_Oh no, he’s employing the puppy eyes NO must resist! Ugh. Damn… he even asked nicely…_

“Ok _fine._ I guess we can see some of the other animals”

**“Yes!”**

_This is such a bad idea. What am I thinking? Oh that’s right, I’m not._ Eddie continued to walk around the corner which lead to another set of exhibits.

**“What is _THAT!”_** Venom then proceeded to drag their body to the nearest exhibit which was holding a large brown bear that was playing with a watermelon. Eddie could feel Venom vibrating inside him with excitement, he wouldn’t be exaggerating if he said that Venom felt like a kid in a candy store. **“Eddie I have never felt this emotion before. The animal is eliciting a positive response in me… it is very…. Cute?”** Eddie could not contain his laughter, of course the symbiotes first experience with the human objectification of animals would be because of a highly dangerous bear that was playing with a watermelon. Of course, he shouldn’t have expected anything different. **“Eddie why am I feeling like this? I do not understand. This creature is supposed to be food. Why do I want to take care of it like it is one of my own?”**

“Oh geez V it’s a little complicated. You see humans are pretty social animals, we like being around other people.”

**“Weak.”**

“As I was saying, humans don’t need a pack but we thrive in the presence of those we care about and love.”  
 **“Like you thrive in the presence of Dan and Anne when we go to their home to have dinner?”**

“Yes, exactly like that.”

**“What does this have to do with the fuzzy animal in the exhibit?”**

“If you would stop interrupting me then maybe I could get to the point I was trying to make.” Venom hissed softly but did not comment further. “Again, as I was saying, humans don’t need company, but they prefer it though unfortunately human relationships can be taxing and sometimes we just want the love of a relationship without all the complications and arguments that can arise from human companionship. Hence, the humans evolutionary love for animals and the ability to try and pack bond with anything and everything with a heartbeat.”

**“Soo… humans want to copulate with animals?”**

“NO! Humans do NOT want to copulate with animals. That is bestiality, the human race lets a lot of weird things slide like fried butter but we are pretty against trying to have sex with animals.”

**“Humans do not want to copulate with animals. Then what do humans want to do with animals.”**

“Humans want to love animals and for animals to love them. They want a relationship where the other partner will love them but has no real ability to question their motives, animals are perfect for this because they can’t speak any human languages. Also animals have a simpler mindset than humans, a good portion of the animals affections can be bought with food.”

**“Ahh I see. Humans want something to be physically affectionate to. Something they can manhandle in exchange for food.”**

“You’re getting closer. Humans don’t want something to manhandle, they want something that shows them affection for their efforts, it doesn’t even have to by physical. For example look at the cat. Half the human population loves those little suckers and they aren’t even fully domesticated like dogs. A cat could simply meow at their owner when they get home from work and the person would probably keel over in joy because ‘they missed me!’”

**“I think I understand now. Humans want a relationship of inferiority, they want something that has less mental capacity to approve of them. They feel the need to gain praise from an animal that probably has no concept of what praise even is and when they are rejected they probably feel dejected as if the animal knew exactly what to do to hurt their delicate feelings.”**

“…… Well…. You aren’t wrong. Though that is probably the worst way I have ever had it described to me. I’m guessing you are no longer feeling the warm and fuzzies for your new bear friend?”

**“No I am still feeling your human stupidity. I can not deny that the animal in front of me looks adorable in its current state. I do not feel the need to eat it at this moment.”**

“I guess that’s a good thing then. Why don’t we keep looking through the rest of the center? We can contemplate on the failures of human evolution when we get home and when I have somewhere to have an existential crisis on, preferably my bed.”

**.**

**.**

**.**

 

**“Thank you Eddie. We enjoyed seeing the animals at the zoo.”**

“Nope. It was not a zoo, do not call that place a zoo it will get bad rep for the rest of its life, do not jinx it like that. No that was a rehabilitation center, it permanently houses injured animals that can’t care for themselves and temporarily keeps animals that have a chance at rehabilitation.”

**“Shut up Eddie. We were trying to be nice….”**

“Okay what do you want. You are never nice to me out of the kindness of your heart.”

**“I AM PLENTY NICE TO YOU! I HAVENT EATEN YOUR KIDNEYS HAVE I?”**

“No you have not eaten our kidneys as of lately. Though my statement still stands, what do you want?”  
 **“…”**

“V?”

**“I want something.”  
** “You’re going to have to be more specific than that V.”

**“An animal. I want something to ‘pack bond’ with as you said earlier.”**

“V… we can’t just get an animal. You are going to want to eat it within a couple of days and we’re probably going to forget to feed it and it will hate us and run away.”  
 **“Your arguments are invalid. I would not eat something I cared about and I would also never forget to feed it. I remember to feed you don’t I?”  
** “That was one time! And it was only because I was late on a deadline that Iforgot to eat.”

**“You forgot to eat for 2 days.”**

“Point proven that I can barely care for myself let alone a dog.”

**“Who said anything about a dog.”**

 

**.**

**.**

**.**

“I can’t believe you convinced me to do this.”

**“Do not lie. We can already feel the dopamine flooding your system. You are happy that we did this.”**

“I can’t deny that the furball is pretty adorable, but don’t forget our agreement _you_ will be feeding it.”

**“It’s a her Eddie. Not an it, do not disrespect her like that.”**

“She’s already got you wrapped around her finger and she hasn’t been in the apartment for even a day.”

**“We are not wrapped around her finger! We are ensuring the that we will get the most affection out of the creature, it will do wonders for your sad human brain.”**

“You sure about that?”

**“I am certain Eddie.”**

**_“_ ** _Meow?”_

**“Eddie she meowed at me! She loves me!”**

**Author's Note:**

> This fic had me laughing so hard when I wrote it, though it was also at like 11:00 at night so maybe that contributed to my humorous state. Anyways I hope y'all enjoyed this fun little one-shot. Comments fuel me, plz comment if you felt your thirst quenched by this fic.


End file.
